below was written during one sleepless night. some funny stuff me thinks. enjoy!
frohawk
it's fucking hot in the bay! okay, it's not caribbean hot, but it dayum hot. can't sleep. so i'm writing this and listening to gare du nord.
i've had some strange moments. like the creepy trailer parents and their hifey kid at grocery outlet one afternoon. everywhere i went in the store, i kept crossing their path. i would divert and bump into them again. their energy was disconcerting. it's a bit like having to adjust your pace to someone moving at the same speed and same direction you are. 'am i freaking them out? are they freaking me out?' or 'am i freaking myself out?'
on a run one night for coconut bliss ice cream (which btw is the bomb!) an employee at the ec natural market asks me if i need help, they're closing soon. i'm right near two other women he says nothing to. for some reason i'm singled-out. i was polite, 'i'm fine thanks.' but he seemed uncomfortable as though he was made to approach me. later i thought, wtf. did i look like a shoplifting thug eyeballing the bulk bins. maybe so. i was wearing my puffy jacket and yoga pants. you can stash a lot of bulk nuts in yoga pants.
***
spring. i love this time of year, paticularly around the bay. a lovely season to hike out to the coast. ladies and gentlemen, barbra - on a clear day you can see forever.
during class today i became conscious that my hands were clasped in a knot of stressed outedness. i then became self-aware and relaxed. be joyful in the moment, grasshopper. after that i got the sweetest hug from jaylen, a student who is riley freeman from the boondocks in human form. i kid not! some days i can't even look at him because i start to remember the gangstalicious episodes and i nearly lose my nut.
*****
white people suck. this is scientific fact. i've done the research and have developed this ground-breaking formula: arrogant + snatch all the coolest shit ever which then becomes suck + keep following or eye-balling me around in stores - appropriate my culture yet lack complete understanding + hippie scourge (who've co-opted reggae festivals, thai tattoos, and for naming themselves redwood bark or asstral moon) = wacky whitey. what is it they are lacking? identity?
disclaimer: my mother is not included in my formulation since she's 100% italian and therefore does not fall into the anglo-saxon determinate which my theory is based on.
*****
invasion of the mosquito hawks. there is a plethora of these big aerodynamically challenged creatures invading my apt. some live, others die (otome hunter), but as long as they get them nasty skeeters that feast on my mulatto blood i am so cool with their presence. trundle on, my culicidae critters!
****
i've come to the conclusion that i am not that interesting, but i have done interesting things. there are some really interesting people in the world however such as this dude. alas he passed away. insane artist freak. i actually saw his ass at a gay club in nyc. his costumes were amazing.
****
one of the most joyful things i've come across in awhile were fotos of a friend's trip to japan. this was broken up into several parts over several weeks as he zig-zagged between osaka, hiroshima, kyoto, and tokyo. some beautiful images, detailed well-written captions, and at times hilarious obervations. i still laugh thinking about the deer on an island off the coast of hiroshima that freaked him out. 'plague carriers'. (lol)
****
i said, 'gentelmen don't wear their pants like that.'
'only pimps!' ulysses stated.
